Never let a moment go by where you are afraid to speak, breathless and passionate moments β¨οΈ say what you need to say, feel how you need to feel and never be ashamed of the fire inside!
I don’t believe that everyone is passionate I believe you either are or your not! But, I believe that writers and musicians and artists have a special fire inside and it comes out in there creativity!
My body and soul is exploding with mixed emotions and I am letting them be revealed to the world and myself as I watch my life through the hard times and the good times Excell!
Live and Love with all that you are! β€οΈ And don’t be afraid to say what you need too! Nor be afraid to be who you where meant to be…a STAR π Go to my site the song will play there! Enjoy π
Thinking about life, love, family! Praying in this shity time we are in, I stay humble, kind and forgiving π Believing there is a difference in making a mistake, be granted forgiveness verses not practicing what you preach and keeping things in a premeditated state! Not taking time for granted and engulfing myself with loved ones because no day is certain! It’s not who or what you portray to the world its who you are when noone is watching, all about the soul baby! Remember God is listening, he hears the whispers and conversations! Not hesitating on saying what you need too meaning go with gusto in all areas of your life as you can’t say it when your gone! As I go about my day I have to focus on not getting stuck in the mud but living for the magic I am trying to create even if it takes awhile to get there because mundane is just not how I was created to live! Just a coffee and a writers words looking out a stained glass window this morning π while I work!
First I’d like to thank, “The war at home and Narc Wise” for these on point and factual truths about life and living with a narcissist! See pics below β€οΈ
Unfortunately, for me, I’ve had the unpleasurable experience of living with a narcissist! I was able to control my sanity while living in survival mode! This is not typical for most and although hard you question everything and anything, therfore, nothing seems real! Anyone who knows what narcissistic abuse feels like will tell you it’s a constant war between reality and survival mode and remembering what’s right or wrong and staying in touch with yourself while being abused! All I can say was it was a fight for my life, and while working and raising kids I had to maintain my focus and not lose myself in the crazy and it was crazy, painfully such! More on that later!
For now, looking back, I was glad that my strong will for life and for my dreams helped keep me going and if I can offer advice to anyone suffering any abuse, whether physical and or emotional or mental find someone to confide in and let them help you to safety as you won’t really see the repercussions of what abuse does to your brain until you leave! There will be some PTSD and for me it’s been an ongoing feeling of indecisiveness even down to what I eat each day something so minuscule is so heavy for someone who’s reality was tested daily!
Don’t, let anyone tell you how to live your life you have to live your life on your own terms! Its imperative in this short life but you also have to get rid of the naysayers, the haters, you have to get rid of those in your life that thrive on drama and those that try to control your life such as the narcissist! The narcissist used to tell me all the time when I would express how I wanted to live my life, what I saw for my life, and the dreams that I had for my life, he use to state and i quote, “I would never make it without him”! Well, he is eating his words now! Since leaving him, I have opened my own business, I have doubled my income in less than a year I live in peace and tranquility I have returned to what normal is in a relationship and in life in general! And as my buisness grows it will be lucrative! I have healthy, happy kids and a family that lives in peace and unison all together! So when he quoted I WOULDN’T MAKE IT WITHOUT HIM it was actually the opposite, I WOULDN’T MAKE IT WITH HIM!!
Happy Thursday Everyone! Live, Love and Never have regrets! π
Sharing more quotes from a very on point site based in the miserable world of narcissistic relationships! Thank you Narc Wise!! π
Sometimes when I view them I get that reminding twinge of nausea reliving the feeling of a unhappy, ill normal home and toxic relationship.
But, I feel as sicken as that past was for me I have also gained knowledge and strength of what I learned, whom I have become, and how powerful I am! And in turn want to continue focusing on the healing and life i have before me! And in turn helping others stuck in that suffocating feeling of regret and fear that life will slip away and they will face there death bed with a heart full of pain and regret π π’
Slowly I will bring into focus not only my passionate poems β¨οΈ but my thirst for helping others in similar situations get out safely and gain the strength to do so!
I am not certified in counseling and or am suggesting that in any way shape or form that I am. I am solely basing this on years of my life wasted with a narcissistic man who treated me one minute like I was the most valued diamond ( a trophy wife) whom he could buy and at the same time would devalue me and discredit me in order to keep possession of me! See this is a prime example of a narcissist, looking for approval and recognition from the same person you want to discredit and devalue because they lack self esteem and use manipulation as control! Doing this to me was one thing flipping the switch and adding my kids into this qrotesge endveor is another! Two out of 3 of my kids saw into this fake Jekyll and Hyde situation and one feels as I see it pity, as so to speak. He feels sorry for him in some ways as he feels he lost a whole family (as if treating a family abusively gives you any form of right) This kind hearted child of mine witnessed and experienced the abuse as well, but, shortly as he moved out early! By the way point in case was also at the hands of this narcissistic man and cost me a pretty penny to set my son up when he felt he couldn’t come home and was told not to even come home for Christmas which i will embark on later as well as the mere thought of this past makes me want to vomit aggressively! Narcissist are good at playing the victim in every situation which I will embark on later too. Let me point out this is NOT there father as we had no kids together and these are NOT his grandchildren whom he keeps himself attached, he was someone in my life for several years whom never earned these rights biologically or otherwise and really needs to move on and create his own family not hitched still with mine. There REAL father and I have a bond even though we are divorced we created a beautiful family and we still till this day share in that and always will! The narcissist needs to tuck his tail between his legs stop feeling sorry for himself and move on and leave my family alone!
I am not sure if I will start another blog on this topic or purely add this in to this one along with poetry. But, whatever I do I hope to help someone out there realize life is too short and noone can control your life, and if you feel like you have to constantly record things to prove your not crazy, or your family tells you that your not the same since being with someone, if your in denial when friends and or family tell you that your being controlled or manipulated and you calmly lie to save yourself from embrassment, and or you have lost your self, job, possessions and have changed solely for this person and constantly are walking on eggshells then you just may be dealing with narcissistic abuse!
It’s a dark world, it’s a narcissistic world, and IT IS ABUSE!
As a certified medical assistant I know what it does, psychologically and physically to the mind and body as I am slowly recovering 2 years later.
I hope to help others out there and maybe save someone! This life is too short to waste and i wasted too much time, time i can not get back however my future is bright, calm and full of possibilities now since leaving behind the demonic human i gave years tooπ
Something different coming from me today as I purged out the demonic human beings I have known in the past with minds so twisted and hearts cold and dead, the words flowed like a river from my mouth to this page like I saw each one and cursed there demonic existence! In a lifetime I have known 3 not one more worse then the other but all psychopathic on some level. Hold onto your seat and enjoy π
There names a curse
Hex
She witnesses them as they are casted into the inferno π₯
Praying they be painfully scorched
There agony like music to her ears
The years wasted on the unworthy
Pyscopaths
Her once crippling sympathy
To pity them and engage in time with them
Left behind taunting images
Of diseased ridden
So cold beings
She takes a deep breath
And purges the bastards once known to her
There blackened souls
Praying for redemption
Smelling of burnt flesh
Decaying in a unmarked grave
From years of hearts so frigid and minds so twisted
Everyone on here has witnessed and watched me evolve and grow from the narc relationship I was in and left 2 years ago! Life went from torment and crazy and toxic to beautiful and successful and happy and calm!
I have a successfully running buissness and I have kids that are happier in their home, living peacefully and without any issues! Home is finally a peaceful tranquil, NORMAL environment!
My future plan is to embark on narcissism fully and to possibly speak on it as I’d like to help those out there suffering the same toxic demise I was! Statistics show most will never escape! I am a strong willed individual who maintained my strength and clarity during the abuse! It’s not easy to leave but when you have confidence and love yourself you will leave anyone whom does not treat you with respect and kindness! My goal is to educate and help someone else who is going through abuse!
Hope this motivates you the way it does me each and every morning π to achieve my goals!
To the narcissist!
You said I couldn’t do it, you said, I’d never make it! I am relentless. I am driven, and I am coming after everything you said I couldn’t have!
Let me tell you this, I have everything I need! My success is my insanity and it keeps me up at night pushing, pushing πͺ me to the top!
I have a harmonious home, a great start to a successful career, my own business, successful, thriving, happy children! A loving, gentle, passionate man who showed me unconditional love! I have everything you said I would never have! I not only beat you, I WON! I HAVE EVERYTHING IN MY LIFE THAT I NEED!
Thank you for being a screw up! I hope someday you change your ways, i don’t wish harm i already got even! See, i was a fighter, that fighter mentality was something in me that scared the shit out of you! Thats why you tried to control me, and when you realized you couldn’t, it made you more angry and that anger motivated me to get so angry i left you right where you belonged in your misery and desperation! Life is too short to be miserable, and no one should ever give up anything in their life for someone else’s dreams or love! How far I have come!
Maybe this speal will touch and / or push someone else to do what they need to do! And someday I will speak to the world as a motivational speaker and I will help those who are like me! See probably something else you didn’t know about me, another dream of mine! Ha, but what did you know about me anyway π π
You must be logged in to post a comment.